Monthly Archive for May, 2009

Airtel Mobile: 100 million customers?

The magic figures are conjured out of no where. No one has done a head count nor audited their records. It is a fucking company’s claim and everyone is taking it on the face value. Assholes indeed!!

If Airtel is the “largest” mobile service provider, kudos to it for keeping the mobile number portability in abeyance. I know of several people who would be glad to shift over to a new service provider given the choice.

Airtel is desperate to scale up the economies. It knows for sure that it cannot survive alone on it’s laurels and needs to expand in the next growth oppurtunity in the rural areas. That is logical because that’s the only area that is untapped. Of course, much like the “soul harvesters”, Airtel can only expand in untapped markets and avoid the overtly saturated urban areas.

In addition to that, make it’s books look sexy so that it could sell itself off to the highest bidder. I have a feeling that Airtel would exit from the telecom business and solely focus on retail for the “next growth” and adopt the same tactics as it employed in selling crappy mobile phone services. Of course, it could exit out with a HUGE profit in tow…. one of the American companies like AT&T or it’s ilk would be interested to set a foothold in India.

It helps to have Sunil Bharti Mittal in the thinktank of “FICCI“; they help to “steer the nation for prosperity”. I am sure that their “political donations” helps to keep the frigging audit trails off their back and any kind of a probe in the “real numbers”.

100 million is a huge number but given the ever expanding population of this vast nation, it seems that only one tenth of the population is covered. By any account, if Airtel wants to attract more customers to it’s fold, it has to set a minimum threshold for the customers to stick to it. For example, it could sell ultra cheap netbooks with a locked in high end phones. Instead of being “re sellers” for the utterly useless iPhones, it could deal with the likes of Nokia to sell the uber cool E series and address a price sensitive market to mature towards higher end phones.

If they think that by selling “customised phones” with pre loaded music works, they are probably licking a horses’ ass and surviving solely on it’s dung. Thats the quality of their services and I am sure no one gives a middle “F” about it. Their marketing strategy sucks, in my humble opinion,and none of them is wiser about it.

The next 100 million customers, if the numbers are right, would solely come from adpating to the changing marketing scenario. It’s easier, nodoubt, to pointificate, and call the Airtel guys as morons, but again in my humble opinion, I am not way off the mark. They swing from being utterly confused idiots to demented nincompoops.

All the best Sunil Bharti Mittal!

Broadband in India: A “white paper”.

Broadband in India Broadband in India drapuri The state of Broadband in India

I came across this on the forums. This is the “true state” of pathetic access here in India. I am linking on to this so that everyone can read this.

Indian Telecom: Why this negativism?

I am increasingly turning into a cynic for all practical purposes. The guilty are not punished (witness A Raja who made pots of money before he demits his office) whereas the public is being shortchanged for lack of clear cut guidelines.

I am all out for mechanisms where the public as a whole has the right to demand services since the spectrum is owned by them. The companys donot own it automatically; I believe that they are just offering a “value added service” for which they charge us. If the value added service (either being it a voice call or the ringtones) not up to the expectations, they should be taken to task.

I get a lot of comments here on the blog each one cribbing about the fact their operators but there is no one willing to take up the cudgels against them. That pisses me off to no end.

I am still hoping that perhaps BJP in the new Government would do something about this seriously.

Aircel India: False start?

This is owned by Maxis Telecom who had bought a controlling stake from some “maverick investor”. They are in the process of scaling up their services in North India and have look alikes of the Indian Cricket players with Dhoni in the lead.

The fact of the matter is their insipid advertisements and the awful post paid plans which make no sense in the already crowded market. At best, they could have easily offered always on Internet connectivity for a fixed monthly price or some “exciting” post paid plan with the gurantee that the network issues would be sorted out gradually.

As an independent blogger, the usual constraints to write about the companies in glowing terms is not there. I hjave always refused to accept the advertisements for the same reason. This blog remains a medium for my own opinions and I am welcome to them.

I wrote to Aircel about this blog and wanted to know an answer to a simple question as to how Aircel is better than the existing players and why should I shift to an Aircel number; even if the mobile number portability is announced. The mail was sent almost two to three months back; so far there has been no reply from them.

This means, I am forced to assume that it is staffed by some brain dead idiots who donot realise the importance of “alternative media” exposure. Specially when a blog is being indexed by Google.

Any negative (or positive) experience with Aircel? I am keen to know. Please send in your feedback or in the comments below.

Vodafone India: Zoo zoos

They have a fancy name for the plasticky faces on thin and anorexic women models and surprisingly, their advertisements are a huge hit in the current IPL matches.

I understand that they were a “hot topic” of discussion after the making of the advertisements was shown in some frigging channel.

If the whole idea is to “stimulate” the discussion, it makes sense from purely advertising point of view. In my opinion, it is a refreshing change from the pug as a mascot to the anorexic malnourished women. It has no relevance whatsoever, for the services that the company renders nor the type of their services.

I can assure that they have demented dim wit morons staffed in their division. It does try to create a positive spin around the “ownership” but in pure terms of customer satisfaction or network coverage I would rate Vodafone as one of the worst I have ever encountered.

I am seriously waiting for the mobile number portability to be introduced so that I can bet my options and shift to an operator which suits my temperament.

Airtel Broadband: Assholes

There is no other word to describe the scumbags who are hell bent on ruining an excellent service. Rome wasn’t built in a day and I have no clue as to why they want to implement their “fair usage policy”; unless of course they are extremely worried about the “load” it would cause on their frigging copper cables.

Airtel had a headstart as far as the Broadband was concerned. They could afford to deploy best of technologies and get superior cables. They were not plagued by the usual red tapism and clearly were not answerable to the public for their investments. I am not sure but I have a feeling that they donot have those fancy Chinese crap as their backend. They made a huge splash when they announced their underground submarine cable from Chennai to Singapore to carry the streams of data. Where is the “leader” now?

There is only word to describe them: Assholes for their pig headed policies.

I remember the time when my Internet had conked off. It took an entire cabling change without rectifying the problem. Ultimately, the problem was traced to their exchange; I am sure that they would have to revoke the “fair usage policy” because I raised a hue and cry about not getting the promised speeds. It is conjectural to assume the exact cause of the troubles; nevertheless it was a relief to have someone come from the company to sort out the issues at odd hours.

It’s time that Airtel pulls up it’s socks and decides about taking the lead without being vindictive. Their mobile division sucks to the core (as it’s infested with the likes of BSNL’s babus) but even if they work in a fancy corporate office, it doesn’t cost me to heap up abuses against them.