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Airtel Broadband: Assholes

Abhishek — Tue, 05 May 2009 16:31:04 +0000

There is no other word to describe the scumbags who are hell bent on ruining an excellent service. Rome wasn’t built in a day and I have no clue as to why they want to implement their “fair usage policy”; unless of course they are extremely worried about the “load” it would cause on their frigging copper cables.

Airtel had a headstart as far as the Broadband was concerned. They could afford to deploy best of technologies and get superior cables. They were not plagued by the usual red tapism and clearly were not answerable to the public for their investments. I am not sure but I have a feeling that they donot have those fancy Chinese crap as their backend. They made a huge splash when they announced their underground submarine cable from Chennai to Singapore to carry the streams of data. Where is the “leader” now?

There is only word to describe them: Assholes for their pig headed policies.

I remember the time when my Internet had conked off. It took an entire cabling change without rectifying the problem. Ultimately, the problem was traced to their exchange; I am sure that they would have to revoke the “fair usage policy” because I raised a hue and cry about not getting the promised speeds. It is conjectural to assume the exact cause of the troubles; nevertheless it was a relief to have someone come from the company to sort out the issues at odd hours.

It’s time that Airtel pulls up it’s socks and decides about taking the lead without being vindictive. Their mobile division sucks to the core (as it’s infested with the likes of BSNL’s babus) but even if they work in a fancy corporate office, it doesn’t cost me to heap up abuses against them.

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Airtel Fair Usage Policy :”SUCKS”!

Abhishek — Wed, 11 Mar 2009 02:50:22 +0000

There has been a flurry of activity in the blogosphere and a lot of people have bandied together to protest against the assinine policy of Airtel which seeks to limit our choice and control the access to Internet. Screwheads have totally lost out any imagination to spur the Internet access and in this day and age of recession, see no merit in upgrading the existing infrastructure.

Hence, they have bandied together to implement their “fair usage policy”.

Surprisingly and happily, it has found a mention in the mainstream media. Mint has taken up the cudgels on behalf of the existing customers and I truly laud their efforts.

There is no other way except to show a middle finger to the likes of Tatas (are they not always on the wrong end of the stick?), Airtel boffins (why are you screwing up a fantastic service) and Sify (the original buggers who have bastardised the broadband access in India). There are other smaller players who source their bandwidth (in effect work as re-sellers) and would be glad to limit the access accordingly.

Surprisingly, Internet and Mobile Association of India ( a bealagured body that is a rag tag association of the service providers) has spoken out against it’s members. It’s president (or whoever the self proclaimed titular head) has gone on record to say,

“If the service is provided under ‘broadband’ to the customers when they signed in, it cannot be reduced to 128 (kbps) since the government of India definition of broadband is minimum 256 (kbps). This is a violation of government policy as well as short-changing customers if they had signed in for a broadband service.”

Violation of government policy? Really? Which one dude?

For all practical purposes, I request the readers to sign up the petition to protest against the restrictive access. It can be found here.

We are already having a pathetic state of affairs. The frigging morons expect the users to broadband to check email alone. Thats the state of majority of the users.

Who has given them the right to limit our access? Beats me.

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Airtel: “Fair usage policy”?

Abhishek — Thu, 26 Feb 2009 05:11:34 +0000

Airtel Fair Usage Policy

Publish at Scribd or explore others: Contracts Business & Legal airtel fair usage po airtel broadband

If this is true, there is some moron working overtime to kill the fantastic service. If I took an unlimited connection, it doesnt mean that it has to come with caps. Unlimited, for the uninitiated ASSHOLES means that it comes WITHOUT any CAPS on the downloads.

There is a petition against them regarding this “drastic announcement”. So far, the indications are that this doesn’t apply to the NCR region. Yet, it would be a BIG disaster if the policy gets into picture.

What the F*** is TRAI doing? Why are they sitting on their asses and not doing anything about it?

Correction. TRAI has NOT done anything about ANYTHING. I doubt whether the boffins would be “constrained” to act proactively.

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Airtel Broadband: 1 Mbps

Abhishek — Wed, 31 Dec 2008 14:41:54 +0000

This is one of the best ever plans from Airtel. 1Mbps unlimited via WiFi. Wow. It’s a “true broadband”. I have been lucky enough to migrate to a newer plan after I got a pay revision and I have gifted myself the new speed. The biggest gain has of course been watching the amazing videos posted online. It would also speed up the torrents big time.

I am keeping my fingers crossed for proper implementation of the Broadband policy so that the distance between the haves and havenots comes down.

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The wonders of being interconnected

Abhishek — Sat, 16 Aug 2008 03:24:11 +0000

I seem to have embraced the digital lifestyle for sure. I must confess that I am hooked on to the Web 2.0 as a social phenomenon; although I do feel hamstrung by the pathetic and high cost of access here in this country.

I have a slow (and unreliable) BSNL connection at my home and a fantastic Airtel Broadband at my work place. My daily life revolves around checking my updated RSS feeds and email including the updates on Facebook. I progress to check the new updates in the journals across the world. I get all the twitter updates on my cell, although its difficult to ensure a smooth service. I use Flickr account to update my pictures and trust Opera to keep a track of my preferences, updated bookmarks and speed dial across the platforms and geographical location. I use You Tube to stream the programmes I have favourited and watched.

I dont fancy a Blackberry as yet because I dont need an expensive option to reply to emails. So by and large, I am connected and hooked to the Internet. It hasnt taken over my life as yet but I realise that connectivity can be so important to know about what’s happening in the real world.

All this has become possible recently as part of the “broadband” revolution sweeping in. This sounds like a cliche. It really is. Much of the country is in the dark as far as basic connectivity is concerned. The “deadlines” have been revised umpteen times and no one looses sleep over the fact that in the global race, Indians are left behind only because the system cannot nurture ideas. None of the applications I mentioned are hosted in India nor designed by Indians. There are a host of me too applications chasing the fragmented pie with a “desi flavour”; it remains a disappointing experience to see that they cannot even ensure coding their web sites with existing web standards.

Societal bonds would change with the increasing thrust of Internet. As geographical boundaries melt away, we are going to see an increasing collaboration of people with common interests coming on a common platform with more profusion of ideas to collaborate towards similar goals. All in all, the existing system should facilitate this interaction. Only then, we would see the true wonders of being interconnected and interaction.

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Airtel Broadband: Wow customer services

Abhishek — Mon, 04 Aug 2008 11:21:30 +0000

Airtel Broadband offers customer servie levels unheard of in the industry. My splitter wire had gone kaput for some reason. I called up the customer care for the non functioning Internet. Within 2 hours, there was a dude at my doorstep. After fixing the fault, he gave me a receipt of the fixed fault, made me talk to a person sitting in the backend to close the complaint who cross checked with me regarding his complaints.

From close conversation, it was clear that the “engineers” are trained IT professionals. This is a drudgery job but someone has to do it. For every “colony”, there is a designated professional who handles about 10-15 complaints on an average. They offer their numbers because once you lodge in a complaint, the call gets “locked” and it is company’s hassle to resolve the issue within 4 hours. They make these claims in the advertisements and it works most of the times under ideal conditions. I was impressed with these people and their handling of the issue in a clean manner.

Airtel Broadband has a long way to go and they are selling their connections majorly on the strength of their Broadband expertise. The jury is out there and I wouldn’t be wrong in claiming that this is one of the best ISP’s in business. I have never faced a downtime; barring this issue but then this was a fault in the splitter wire worn out of use. Excellent.

Here is a message to other companies. Tone up your service levels and customer delight would follow. It only demands an attention to detail, scale up the protocols and review of the services. At end of the day, customer is the king and he deserves it so.

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Airtel Broadband: Dropping too many connections nowadays

Sushubh — Fri, 18 Apr 2008 09:01:19 +0000

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Airtel Broadband Offensive Advertisement

Sushubh — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:46:17 +0000

This is just the worst form of advertising being done by Bharti Airtel. These guys need to think about the message they are conveying to the end customer.

Sam noticed the Xbox 360 videogame controller in the graphic… So perhaps the company is trying to say… Play videogames online on Airtel Broadband and you would have a life. Otherwise, you ought to be ashamed of it!

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Airtel Broadband: Offering 1 Mbps unlimited

Abhishek — Mon, 25 Feb 2008 12:20:00 +0000

I got a call from an executive offering me 1 Mbps unlimited for 2222/- per month. He said that this scheme was for “select” priveleged customers and is valid for a short while. Oh gosh. 1 Mbps unlimited..!

This only confirms my suspicions. Airtel had used the 512k unlimited as a bait and wanted to “test market” the response to the “top up” offers. This, in my opinion, only serves to entince more people towards the unlimited offerings. I feel that the current price for 1 Mbps is over inflated and it should be brought down to about 1000/- price band. Trust me, the whole existing subscriber base of MTNL would want to sever off their private parts to get hooked on to something like that. As if it really makes a difference….

Airtel has the moolah and they have the network. They can easily take the initiative and soft launch it. As I had mentioned before, word of mouth publicity would do more good. They can upscale their networks in response to the demand, schedule customers (like me) who deserve more bandwidth because suddenly I have discovered that You Tube videos stream so smoothly on the new bandwidth and it has been a discovery of all sorts watching those re runs of Tom and Jerry cartoons.

If only these morons listened….they’d get a very positive feedback from this blog. I promise

Of course, the scheme gets extended to whole of the country where Airtel has it’s presence.

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Airtel Broadband: Ineffective marketing?

Abhishek — Wed, 20 Feb 2008 05:54:48 +0000

Ever since it has introduced the new 512k unlimited plans (much to my delight), I was struck by the stupidity of the dimwits that Airtel has hired. Airtel has a fantastic infrastructure because it was not weighed in by the legacy initiatives of the older sloths, MTNL and BSNL. It introduced 8 Mbps broadband speeds with download limits that anyone would piss on. It would find some eager beavers to taste the “speeds” but it remains useless to ponder on that.

I feel that the “top up” thingy should be declared illegal because you have two plans running concurrently offering the same speeds. They should migrate the existing customers to the present price plan because it makes no sense to pay higher prices for something that doesnt cost much. No one is willing to look into this because the company and the regulator seem to share the same relationship as a client and a prostitute. As long as the right money comes in, the whore mongering goes on with everyone looking at the other way. Unfortunate.

Either way, I have been arguing that the current prices donot reflect the existing price slabs across the world. Most of the major telcos in the developing world have shifted away from the 256k plans and have focussed on higher bandwidth options. Further, the prices across the spectrum are way to expensive in terms of purchasing parity; which effectively means that there is an open loot going on.

Airtel can easily slash down the prices for access; offer unlimited plans with bundling of voice calls and along with that create demand to cater to the new customers. Airtel still advertises mobiles as a lifestyle product; it should be placed as something utilatarian instead of being aspirational. Thats the whole irony of it. Dimwits have access to bucket loads of cash to burn.

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Mobile Internet

Abhishek — Tue, 19 Feb 2008 18:12:36 +0000

This is indeed the “future”; even though I don’t suck up to the idea of wireless. Wireless cannot support the applications; much like the streaming video. BSNL’s EVDO was launched recently and there were couple of first hand reviews from early time suckers claiming about the 2 Mbps thoroughput. It’s hard to believe that from a sarkari outfit but then let’s give them benefit of doubt. There are enough dim wit wonders in this world who would not have been born had their fathers cared to use the “other” hole. Most of these dimwits work for Airtel Broadband

Dirty jokes apart, I am clearly excited about the new age mobile applications. iPhone has shown the way and Google’s Android looks much like a rip off the iPhone interface. Unless, you wish to name it as Android and make a fast buck by calling it “open alliance”. The idea sucks but there are a lot of people gung ho about the “possibilities”. I am more inclinded towards the browser because this is one software that connects to the Internet and beyond. The OS (Operating System) becomes redundant for all practical purposes.

I am linking on to a video of Opera Mini (featured on Opera Watch for starters) and the rendering engine is awesome. Unfortunately, much of the “compression” takes place at Opera’s servers before it serves the web page on your handset which raises privacy concerns. However, I must admit that these are “white man’s concerns” and everyone makes money off the big idea as to what people are surfing in real time. Whether you are watching p0rn or doing Internet Banking.

There is a lot to be discovered.

I wasn’t surprised to read that HDFC and Reliance have created a virtual credit card. Now your mobile would become a payment gateway. This is an old concept and I had first reported about rumours that Tata was planning to launch something similar to this. SMS based transactions, if authenticated, are the safest bet to pay your bills because that would work irrespective of your mobile handset. Tatas, as usual, lost a golden oppurtunity to monetise their network spend and instead fell flat needing the star couple to advertise. Pooh. Dimwits conceptualised from the wrong “holes” need to get back to their roots for proper and effective marketing.

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Airtel Broadband:512k unlimited

Abhishek — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 17:05:41 +0000

I was lucky to have the plan migrated over the weekend. Is it really earth shattering; much like the “big O”? No isn’t. But definitely a lot faster than what I was forced to put up with. I have noticed a weird thing. They have not touched the uploads speeds at all. I am getting slower uploads but faster downloads. This makes it useless for torrents; I believe. Still, something is better than nothing!

Live streaming has become a lot more smoother and has given me a lot more options to switch between channels. I don’t own a TV but with increasing online presence of the TV majors, I’d be soon watching the “saas bahu” serials online. No, I am not kidding. They are a total timepass!

Update: For the first time ever, I have been able to watch You tube videos uninterruptedly. I have been watching IBN Live video streams; as good as the broadcast quality on my laptop! The wonders of technology and the indeed the sense of awe. But wait a sec. Did someone say that in Japan they are bored of 100 mbps speeds? We are in a bullock cart stage as far as technology is concerned.

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Airtel Broadband: Update

Abhishek — Thu, 14 Feb 2008 15:22:05 +0000

It’s confrmed that Airtel is offering a “top up” plan of 512kbps for about 300 bucks. Indeed, a good news. Finally, I have something to cheer for myself because I have “graduated” from the 256k to some “faster” speeds. Here is the link to the current speeds.

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Airtel Broadband: a pleasant surprise!

Abhishek — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 14:48:28 +0000

After writing in a scathing post on Airtel, someone up there seems to have read the previous post. I got a call asking me to upgrade my plan to 512kbps for a slightly more amount than I am paying at present. I hope that someone must be looking forward for a reaction on this blog and here it is!

For 300 bucks more than the basic price for unlimited broadband, I am getting double the speed. I have had no issues with the service as a whole and I am extremely pleased about it. Specially, when I get to read what others are going through.

Interestingly, Reliance has had a soft launch in NCR and they are slowly expanding. It would not be wrong to say that Reliance would look at this extremely lucrative segment; but they would have to spend bucketloads of cash to create a demand for their broadband services. Unless, they strike where Sify or Iquara or Hathway have spread their misery far and wide. They would find droves of eager customers flock for their services. I still hold that the broadband plans have to be compelling enough for people to make the switch.

Airtel’s MBA’s need to tighten up their belts. For all their fancy cars and pay hikes (no, I am not jealous) they come out frothing idiots who would not be able to hold up a bulb to a five year old kid. Their collective IQ amounts to zilch.

Prove me wrong morons. 2Mbps unlimited for 1000 bucks? It’s worth it. I ensure that the entire broadband user forums would be singing paens about you and I promise never to trash you or your collective IQ. Mark my “dangerous” words. The truth is out there. Reliance would surely eat up your share and I am sure most of you would desert Airtel’s sinking ship like rotten rats at the first hint of danger.

Update: This was a “top up” offer where the speeds would be doubled in the night. Bah! This is called as being taken for a “ride”! Sheesh. By the way, I called up the Airtel Customer Care Centre and had to bang my head with dead beat assinine women. They had no clue about the “top up” and it took a lot of cajoling and shouting on the phone to make them see any reason.

I dread calling up the customer care centres; unless one wants to let off his/her steam on the phone or act funny with the “dames”.

Useless offer- Airtel sucks!

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Airtel Broadband: Suckers

Abhishek — Tue, 29 Jan 2008 15:10:03 +0000

Airtel recently reduced the price for 512kbps; I got a call from an excited “executive” who “informed” about the price reduction. In real terms, this doesn’t amount to much since the taxes would anyway make it more expensive than it really is. They could have reduced the prices for 256kbps instead.

Trust the morons to loose an initiative. I wonder as to how do they find enough money to feed an army of MBA’s who sit back and deliberate about doing nothing. (P.S. I don’t like the MBA’s a wee bit). In the past 6 months, ever since I have had Airtel Broadband, there has been a downtime just once. However, others would testify the slackening quality of access elsewhere; Airtel needs to tone up in other parts of NCR.

All said and done, Airtel seriously needs to “take the initiative” and upset other player’s calculation. We would, forever, suffer speeds of “upto” 256k without any appreciable benefit. TRAI is sleeping over the customer complaints and instead of taking any concrete action, prefers to sniff out the babus’ puckered holes. Not a charming thought at any cost, indeed.

If anyone from Airtel is smart enough to read and understand whatever I have written here, take some efforts to have simplified plans and get your IPTV rolling out. It’s high time to wrest the initiative because if Reliance comes calling (as and when they realise that there is a huge stake out in landline business), you guys would be quaking and shitting in your pants. Reliance has already held Airtel’s testicles and turned them blue strangulating them. It would their landline business next. And I dont get my predictions wrong at all.

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Asshole of the year 2007

Abhishek — Mon, 17 Dec 2007 16:11:29 +0000

The final nominees for this years most coveted awards are as follows:
1) Department of Telecom. Ubdoubetdly, my favourites. They have bungled time and again by delaying the policies and failing to have a clear head on one of the most vital resources of the nation. Being headed by an utter moron has not helped the matters. When the going went tough for the previous incumbent, the manmoron of a PM added another dumb joker who has no clue as to why he came out dripping from “that place” soaked in birth juices. I am sure that “intelligence quotient” would be an alien term to the elected representatives for sure.

2) Airtel and Mittal. Having turned his baby venture in to a mega corporate giant, Airtel has been nominated for trying to fool the nation for paying off the spectrum dues. One of the loudest opponents of mobile spectrum auction, they are eating their own refuse and paying up for spectrum calculated on 2001 prices! Whoever would have imagined their stupidities compounded by arrogance! They truly deserve the asshole of the year unless a worthy competitor crops up.

3) Broadband companies led by BSNL. My favourite whipping boy. Ever eager to bare it’s little buttocks, they always ask to be slammed/whipped on their bare asses. The leader of the pack of these idiots is Airtel Broadband who deserves egg on their faces for introducing the ‘fastest’ broadband with a pathetic limit that you would not even piss on it. They feel that the users are dead wimps and nuts who would eat out of their hands for whatever they offer.

4) Tata Communications! Nothing to beat them. They were highlighted in the mainstream press by a lobotomised media house. VSNL Broadband has been labelled as “fraudband” by the intellectual users of this nation and rightly so. Being stung by the negative publicity online on the blogs (yours truly leads the pack to aim his barbs at them) and the mainstream press, they changed their name to Tata Comminucation. WOW. This is the first instance of a company changing it’s name to “reflect on the changing role of a telecom company in 21st century”! Add to this a story of a harrassed customer who weeps like an insufferable widow, moaning and groaning instead of filing a legal suit. Assholes springing up more assholes?

5) My final nominee is YOU, the customer. For staring on instead of doing something. For bleating on the forums without moving your butt to act. Shrugging your shoulders and knowing fully well that this system is your elect without making any effort to improve on the system collectively. For keeping an ostrich like attitude and cheering this process on. For all this you deserve a cold meaningless death. And a horrible death with your fingers, toes, brains, entrails and genitals being devoured by hungry pigs. You ought to be repeatedly struck by lightning for you deserve no mercy. (This is a repeat of the 2006 award but then I am running out of serious ideas!)

By common consensus, I am happy to vote for Tata Communications for Asshole of the year 2007! Tra la la la. They richly deserve this for being in the “communications” business in the first place.

Till next year!

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Airtel Broadband Home Page

Sushubh — Fri, 02 Nov 2007 09:41:32 +0000

Thanks to DontAsk on the India Broadband Forum… I managed to take this screenshot of the Airtel website…

Of course, Airtel is not a web hosting company. But they should make sure that their own website can handle the load of the web traffic.

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Airtel Broadband: Bad Connectivity

Sushubh — Sun, 28 Oct 2007 15:00:23 +0000

This is how pinging Google show at my place. I confirmed from my friend and he is getting ping drops too. After canceling the night double speeds, this is the last thing I expect from Airtel. I am not even sure if the call center guys would take this complaint seriously as the pings get normal randomly… So, it is definitely not the wiring at my place’s problem.

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Airtel Broadband: 2 Mbps boost!

Abhishek — Sun, 28 Oct 2007 01:05:42 +0000

Much like the UFO sightings it had generated a wave of excitement. Most of the Airtel users testifiied getting a temporary 2 Mbps boost! And what a f***ing boost it was! My torrents coursed like crazy, my downloads went off in a jiffy and You Tube was streaming videos like crazy…

It all boils down to the various options that we get to exercise when we have the choice and the bandwidth. If you feel you have a “fast” 256kbps “broadband” wait till you get a 8Mbps thingy. It would surely blow off your pants (in terms of user experience that is). Yet, we as Indians would rather perish than stick out our necks and fight for the issue.

My sources deep inside the Airtel complex are not opening up their mouths as yet. There were various conspiracy theories doing the rounds. Some felt that it was the imminent launch of Airtel’s IPTV launch and this was to test the “load on the lines”- whatever that means. For me, it was a good day; better than the dreary existence otherwise.

I hope that we get to see affordable 2 Mbps soon. Here’s hoping. I’d have something less to bitch about then!

By the way, Airtel is the best ISP I have ever used. In terms of service, they are way ahead of the other ISP’s. I have never faced a downtime (by HIS grace) and the “customer care executives” (or whatever you wish to call those poor blighters) are a shade better than the other counterparts. This is not a blanket endorsement of the morons who are sitting over a goldmine without capitalising on their investment. Still, to their credit, I am sure they would be rolling out something better in the future. I have a testimonial of a customer who’s Airtel landline got installed in 24 hours flat! A working connection in 24 hours! Mine took 72 hours and that too after much threats and cajoling the morons in the fray to get my net working.

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Airtel Broadband: 8Mbps speeds?

Abhishek — Wed, 10 Oct 2007 21:21:00 +0000

Ho hum. 8 Mbps? As usual, the execs were frothing at their mouths claiming to be the “first” to launch 8 Mbps. Their download limits? 7-8Gb. It’s laughable guys.

I wish I could actually electrify their sorry backsides and vanish this scum from the face of this earth. Who would pay 2k for 7/8GB which you can finish off in no time? ISP’s have indeed found a way to add insult to injury.

Why is the media not listening? What is the compulsion for them? If you mouth platitudes about serving the interests of the have nots, why the F*** you act as a consort to the powers that be? In my opinion, this is total betrayal of trust that people place in the fourth estate and with every passing day, it is becoming increasingly clear that media is getting enmeshed with the super power structures.

This news comes in wake of Sunil Bharti Mittal joining the trillionaire club.

So, the powerful become even more powerful.

What are we going to do with faster speeds? Check emails at the speed of light? My middle finger goes upto you guys. You are in the race for asshole of the year award anyway.

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