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I have experimented with the tone and tenor of the write ups here. It’s impossible to update on a daily basis although RSS as a delivery mechanism is very powerful in it’s context; it’s easy to set up feeds to keep the blog updated regularly.

However, I personally feel that the sector as a whole has not evolved to a meaningful extent to report on the events. Vodafone has been dragged to the court. Airtel has botched up it’s 3G offerings. 2G scam has caught up with its final actors. However, this is still the “tip of the iceberg”. A lot goes behind the scenes and some unlucky few get caught up in the swirl. Indeed, they are just minor fronts for the systematic loot.

Writing on all this is a chore. It’s pathetic to repeat the same thing ad-nauseum.

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Hence, I prefer to write when I get a sudden burst of “inspiration”. This blog has definitely morphed from it’s rigid confines of Indian Telecom to something more of a “digital narrative”.

I could also write on the operators elsewhere; unrestricted data does not flow uniformly. Yet, in most of the developing countries, scarcity is something that is engineered. It holds no relevance for most of us to know about what AT&T is doing with it’s T- Mobile acquisition. Further, we have distanced ourselves, not only from the advertising, but also from reporting any industry sponsored events. I routinely get invitations (off and on) but they are mostly from clueless PR executives.

Daily updates is beyond the scope. Writing is a passion and needs to be stoked. Yet, there is no point in being pointless either!

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I had the unfortunate instance of coming across an Idea Cellular subscriber. The complaints were related to call drops and inability to connect to international numbers.

While mobile number portability is an attractive option, yet the only drawback is that it cannot transfer the remaining balance to the operator you wish to get ported to. Repeated emails to their customer care went unanswered; I am glad we got rid of it.

A recommended option is to avoid it totally and look around for MNP.

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A lot has been made up for Google Chrome OS and it’s notebook. It transpires that Samsung and Acer would manufacture laptops for chrome OS.

Is cloud computing inherently better than the “offline model” we have come to rely on? If the recent Amazon outage is any indication, I would prefer not to stick with it. In the same vein, I prefer my data to stay with me.

However, there is a huge business opportunity lurking behind such an initiative. Manufacturers in India (for netbooks/laptops/tablets) are dependent on Microsoft for a tapered down version of it’s utterly useless operating system. They could have easily sponsored a home grown “Indian initiative” for Linux and installed it on a bare bones hardware with Wifi and 3G connectivity. I reckon that using ARM processors, a basic display unit with a keyboard would suffice the price limit of around $200-250. It can be done.

One doesn’t need dual cores to run the fancy software; in any case, I hardly use the computing power at my disposal. But there was no choice in the market. Antix (a derivative of SimplyMepis) or even Arch Linux are good enough alternatives (not to forget Fluxbox and XFCE or E17) as the alternative desktop platforms to power the applications.

The telecom companies could have easily subsidized the model, charging it in their monthly bills. A win win situation. An operating system free of any hassles and companies get to spread the hardware with bundled data plans. I had earlier explored the same option but I guess the fancy CEO’s (who are glorified assholes anyway), are not interested in the blurb.

So you’d find the Vodafone Zoozoo enticing people to try out 3G in a market where computing is still a luxury and smartphones market sorely limited.

Thats stupidity compounded by assholism (of the extreme); because crores are being spent on advertising to milk the few customers who venture to buy out the expensive data plans.

Blah blah blah.

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For long, I have felt the need to do a “consumer survey” which is motivated by real customers than the paid for shit stuff that most telecom operators crow about. It is impossible to capture data from the cross section of the user population and the retards who crowd on the forums would not be able to grasp the import of this exercise.

I realize the difficulties inherent in this exercise immediately. First and the foremost is lack of actual “complaint data”; TRAI does put up the figures online but there is a mechanism where these operators have to report back the action taken on the complaints. This is a good mechanism but I don’t see it enforced or whatever TRAI does, they are clueless idiots to make this data work for a better policy formulation.

Ditto for the existing delivery of the complaint mechanism. An aggrieved customer calls the operator in call center, is given a complaint number (not always) and no time frame for the resolution. I am presuming that their workflow is designed for the said purpose. Like any corporate organization working on “cost savings”, this is possibly “outsourced”. A smart team utilizes “dumb terminals” clogging up the bandwidth for most of “executives”. All the while, these brainless sods make the customers wait even more utilizing the spectrum.

This is a “presumption” but this workflow is bound to keep the customers “unhappy”. Billing and metering issues are definitely top of the list; unfortunately, even these thorny issues are not resolved in their entirety.

What needs to be done? Actually, this could easily be a dissertation exercise, capture and visualize the data and present a solid case report to the telecom companies. However, the implementation needs money and I am unlikely to see any movement on that count.

I could help with some possible criteria; reach me on the email (under “contact”).

One more thing. Reliance, Aircel and Airtel easily top the shit list.

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NYT has a “poigant coverage” of Vodafone India. It gets some facts right. Vodafone is embroiled in a legal case stuck in Supreme court regarding tax evasion. I am not aware of the complexities but Vodafone is still awaiting the final decision.

The second fact is about heavy investments in advertising. If you can’t make up for anything else, scale up the bullshit and so goes the Vodafone’s motto.

Now comes how NYT is unable to refine the issues.

It says,

Vodafone has also been trying to get higher-paying customers on board, by offering monthly unlimited service for BlackBerry users, for example, for 899 rupees ($19.98). But all mobile companies compete fiercely for BlackBerry users, and at around a million people, they make up just a sliver of India’s population of 1.2 billion.

Vodafone has the WORST package in terms of data access. Period. If they feel that they can scale up the revenues by trying to milk the “blackberry” users, they are obviously mistaken and have their heads up their asses.

Vittorio Colao, Vodafone’s chief executive, alternates between enthusiasm and frustration when discussing India. The country’s “communicative, talkative society is the ideal ground for a communications company,” he said in a telephone interview.
At the same time, he said, “in the Indian regulatory system sometimes there is a tendency to see the telecom sector as a lemon to be squeezed.”

Fuck you moron. No one asked you to come here to try and lick the regulator’s ass. If you feel frustrated, leave the damned country. I would have nothing do with your screwed up zoozoo (or whatever contraption you have invented).

Oh here comes the veiled threat: (emphasis mine)

Despite their travails, Vodafone executives say they are committed to India. But they hint that they may rethink things if they are still left with a multibillion-dollar tax bill after the Supreme Court decision this summer.
“We like India, it is an important part of Vodafone; but we need to be reassured that it is a business-friendly environment,” Mr. Colao said. “For the time being we continue to invest.”

Hmmm. Business environment is as good as the fact that a company complies with local laws. If Vodafone decides to evade the tax (as per the Indian tax authorities), then the tax people have a good enough reason. Why should vodafone try and evade the taxes and not play along with what’s fair?

I’d be happy to see it rid of the damned pug and the zoozoo.

If Vodafone is so keen to grow “organically or inorganically” (whatever the fuck that means), they need to listen to their customers first. Arguably, not hide behind a customer care unit, bring in transparency and open up the VAS. For example, there is a huge disconnect in the price for Internet access in pre-paid and post paid segment. How come? In any case, the GPRS sucks (as an end user, I’d never touch this with a barge pole), their VAS is pretty useless.

I’d try and focus something on Content issues later; how mobile customers get shortchanged and what is the possible way out. Seriously, their Indian team needs to gird up because giving service is not a cake walk.

If some dingbat from NYT is reading this, first ascertain your facts. There is lot of PR bullshit mentioned in your write ups; before you hold up the mirror for “responsible journalism”. So far, Vodafone has grown taking advantage of lax regulations (by crowing about continued business interests) but customers are being blatantly ripped off.

I would strongly suggest to avoid Vodafone because it’s post paid plans get pretty expensive in the long run if you use the data services because as they mentioned, they like to squeeze their customers like lemons.

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This is equivalent of Vodafone India buying up Loop/Videocon + other smaller players who got in the “telecom business” because they could encash the spectrum deal. It is a basic premise, should not take long to understand.

A lot of “influential idiots” are not happy about it because it spoils their ecosystem. The big network wheelers and dealers would have deal with a giant monolith and they would not be able to get the same “rates” as they would get otherwise.

Its difficult for me to base any comment on the merits of the case since I am not an expert nor US market is the focus. But it is a bad omen for this country to have international players in the country (can anyone give me any reason as to why BSNL cannot be made proactive) and they are messing up with public property.

I agree to an extent that teledensity has improved with entry of private players. Yes, BSNL has been a failure. Its a pathetic useless company to deal with. But at least it’s publicly owned. The point here is that BSNL could have been made to sweat out, be made to work. It wasn’t done. And then, you don’t have a legislative framework to keep the consumer interests paramount. The regulators have their heads up their ass.

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You Tube Video of Vodafone 3G Advertisement

This is NOT an endorsement for Vodafone. I don’t like this company personally because I find them stupid. And arrogant. And zombified.

But this is not to deny their brilliant marketing tactics. I haven’t come across a better product marketing in India (as far as telecom is concerned) than Vodafone India. On their main web site, although full of “flashturbation”, but nevertheless, gets the prospective customer to wade in through the “3g effect”. Great stuff.

The above advertisement is on roll; I haven’t seen any reactions so far elsewhere but thats the way it is.

Although it has been under a lot of soup regarding alleged “financial irregularities”, still Vodafone (Essar) has managed to pull through without much controversy. There also has been a lot of news about gains in “shift of customers through Mobile Number Portability” (MNP), but I don’t have hard core data.

All the more, it remains to be seen as to how vodafone unlocks the customer’s wallets for it’s 3G. I don’t have any information about it’s plans but it unlikely to go in for any predatory pricing as of now. For all I care, on it’s post paid plans, it charges over 10p/10 kb which is ridiculous. Although I am on Tata Docomo (I find it adequate for my light needs), pre-apid is the way to go.

Lets see how this plays out in the long run. See it for yourself!

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Vodafone 3G Advertisement

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This news has come in from FastCompany

As it says:
The Webbox is externally just a 14cm by 25cm QWERTY keyboard that has an RCA cable dangling from its rear–this coaxial cable will connect to a domestic TV tuned to a particular channel, and lets Webbox content appear on its screen. Inside it’s pretty sophisticated, with the guts of a 3G smartphone powering it–it runs over EDGE or 2.5G networks to get its data, and leverages Opera’s Mini browser suite (which compresses web pages to much smaller file sizes remotely) to ensure that the data burden on cell phone networks is low–which is good for low-income users and struggling cell networks alike–and that the device works swiftly.

It is an interesting concept. It combines a ‘mobile telephony’ through 2.5G (or horrors of horrors through GPRS) and thence output through your television.

I have run Opera Mini on my laptop through Java Emulator; it’s brilliant access at times when I don’t have access to Wifi. This Internet TV is something similar in it’s approach although they have routed the output through a usual TV.

However, this is not the end all. Heavy Java Script sites would not work; although the demo is not clear, Opera Mini is expected to run the mobile versions alone; this is not a very pleasant experience.

What gets my goose is that India has been lumped with the bygone nations -Kenya, Ghana and others. This only reflects their “poverty of thought” and generalized assholism. I am not a fan of Vodafone at all; despite their slick advertisements, it does nothing to “serve” it’s customers and perhaps one of the worst telecom companies. Nevertheless, this is a good innovation; it remains to be see how well they are able to capitalize on this, if and when it is launched.

Oh by the way, expect some rather crude “download limits”; these buggers are going to charge you per kb. Their billing systems are pathetic and try wrangling out the details from their customer care executives. You’d be appalled.

Last but not the least. Beyond certain “platitudes” and ass licking in the media (with crumbs thrown at the journalists and news papers), I really doubt whether they would have a mass market for it. They could have easily loaded up Opera Mobile instead.

And yes, as the dingbat in the advertisement says about “technological leap”, it isn’t so. The mobile phone circuits (and the RAM) is cheap with an output for the TV and external keyboard. It’s not big deal but it’s a good idea.

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Considering the fact that they are main sponsors of a demented serial with main protagonist voted as “person of the year”.

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I think that they have screwed it up given the fact that BSNL has upped the ante as far as tariffs are concerned. With the imminent launch of Airtel/ Vodafone and other private players, it remains to be seen how 3G market would shape up. I think that there is a going to be a big market for the data cards given the pathetic landline access.

Interestingly, here’s something from the Tata’s end user agreement:

Mobile internet is not to be used for other activities (e.g. using your handset as a modem, voice or video over the internet, peer to peer file sharing). Should you exceed your fair usage limit or such use be detected, TTSL reserves right to take action by restricting bandwidth, and/or suspension of data browsing and/ or temporarily suspend subscriber account in case of data usage in violation of fair usage policy.

Ha ha ha. For all practical purposes, I wonder whether they can actually “control tethering”!!

I wonder where did these assholes spring from!

This is taken from the forums:

I usually refrain from speculating on the price wars or report on the “latest trends” but to be honest, these people have screwed it up totally.

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This is what I have been driving at. Get the mass of people to gang together and complain en masse. Only then these companies listen.

I am linking to an interesting story from BBC.This is related to the Android update from Vodafone. Any emphasis is mine.

Last week many customers who own HTC Desire smartphones were prompted to download a software update which they believed was an upgrade to Android.Instead it installed irremovable Vodafone-branded apps and bookmarks, including links to dating sites.

It was crapware from the world’s largest company. People got on line to vent their frustration and anger on it’s forums.

“What really really annoys me is that Vodafone think of themselves as one of the biggest mobile company’s in the world…. however they in one day have managed to annoy most of there customers by spoiling a brilliant phone.”, wrote one of the customers on the forums.

Finally as BBC reports,

Initially, Vodafone refused to back down saying that it customised phone software to “optimise customers’ experience”. However, after several days of complaints it has capitulated to its customer’s demands.

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The asshole of the year undoubtedly goes to Telecom Regulatory Authority of India. For their persistence in making inane rules, for sleeping on with the telecom lobbies, being roughshod by the Department of Telecom and I should question it’s very existence. Given the framework within which it operates, it could have easily questioned the authority of the “minister” in charge for bypassing and challenging it’s authority for everything. The imminent launch of mobile number portability was delayed; for very obvious reasons because the entrenched players have a greater say in the lobby or it must have been a part of the deal to allow new players while the mobile number portability could be delayed based on whims and fancies of established operators. We would never know the real reason but TRAI has been found wanting for lack of action.

As a regulator, it is naive to assume that it has “unprecedented powers”; on the contrary, it has not been able to exercise it’s own powers the way it should act on customers behalf. I remember the time when I had dragged Vodafone to the regulator and made it work. But the compliance reports were never made public. At the same time, it has given me valuable lessons in case I need to drag TRAI to act. The best way is to send them a notice while you complain to your telecom operator. Since most of the operators never respond even to repeated emails, it’s best to file a RTI application and know the status of the compliance reports filed by the operators- the nature of the complaint received from the customer, action taken report on the same and how the case was closed. It is a mandatory requirement but so far TRAI has not made anything public.

The wheels of justice churn slowly in this country. So does the thinking of the populace as well as the elected representatives. The idea is simple. To keep the population under duress, to ignore the idea for reforms and let the status quo remain unchanged. Or else, the Government which seems to “act” cannot really resort to extra judicial or extra constitutional ways and means.

In any case, this is the end of the calendar year 2009 and I do sign off with a heavy heart. The efforts in 2010 would be directed towards a bit of activism given the fact that there are untold academic pressures to “be up to it”

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Calling the COAI as “assholes” is only a reflection of the personal opinion brought about by frustration because of their intense lobbying to delay any customer friendly initiative. After the broadband thingy is sorted out, I would be pressing TRAI for any information to make the telecom companies more responsive. Plus, to find out as to why they permitted the minute plans as existed before and ask them for any compensation if not in monetary terms but force the companies for any excess talk time etc etc.

This maybe a loud thinking but then we should get our money’s worth. It took a lot of time to get Vodafone to work and improve upon their services.

Wait and watch. I feel that the best is about to begin as yet. Let’s wait for the mobile number portability and the magic. The ‘revolution’ my dear friends has come NOW.

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Dear Sir,

This refers to Shyam Ponnapa’s write up on BS dated 05/110/2009 (Managing Spectrum Efficiently).

The big question. Why do we need 3G? Why not focus on the land line business alone for broadband access? Or better still. Community Wifi?

The arguments for doing away with this are many. Community Wifi is deemed to be a security risk but then countries like Singapore have implemented this on a large scale nationwide. The mobile phones required to access 3G invariably have Wifi access too. Unless, the telecom companies are expecting surefire hits like Apple iPhones or flood of other smart phones to access the Internet, it is not happening.

We don’t have accurate numbers about the likes of Reliance and Tata who are offering their 3G access. If initial reports are to be believed, they are plagued by “line of sight” hassles, ‘network congestion’ and lackluster customer support. To top it all, it has the access limitations which means that broadband access, even on the 3G spectrum would be capped for very obvious reasons.

We have enough bandwidth in the country but as anyone would testify, we have problems in implementing the “last mile access”; having a contentious set of issues like 3G is not going to solve the persistent problem of “last mile access” because no one is interested in sinking money for a long term.

We can have a fair idea from the existing companies like Airtel or Vodafone who charge exorbitant rates under the present implementation of “mobile internet”. What is the guarantee that they would lower down the prices once they pay fancy sticker prices in 3G auction?

3G, would most likely be used for carrying more voice traffic because none of the players harbours any disillusionment about the “mobile broadband” across the length and breadth of the country.
The market for value added services is locked up within the “walled garden” of the existing players; it is unlikely that 3G access would “revolutionize” the content.

This pretty much sums up what I have always alluded here and my opposition to 3G remains.

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I have already documented that each operator needs to file a compliance report with TRAI every quarter including the action taken on the same. I had to push the company to act based on the threats sent as I insisted that they be made public using RTI. It was a “threat” alone which did the trick.

Further, the nodal officer and the appellate authority system doesn’t seem to be working because they are company officials. Even though it is mandated that all complaints be addressed in a time bound manner, it doesn’t happen so. What is the way out?

Department of Telecom is going through it’s own hassles with CBI raids in connection with the huge telecom scam related to auction of spectrum. I don’t foresee anything coming out of it (nor it’s worth reporting here) because it is just political arm twisting. Those officials are useless anyway; in that case, DoT is out of question.

That only leaves us with the option of TRAI and the idea that it needs to be more proactive in enforcing it’s own regulations. This calls for a concerted action against the errant officials because the companies are focused only on customer acquisition and not customer retention. Mobile number portability MIGHT change the service scenario a bit but I am being cynical about it because the exit and the entry barriers would be unfair to customers; unless the ensuing events prove me wrong. The charges for plan migration have yet not been defined; we as customers should demand a “pro-customer” outlook and not whims and fancies of fat cats dictating terms to both Government and Media.

On a happy note, the network coverage in my premises has vastly improved in all areas of building making it a hassle free experience. It took time and effort but it was worth it.

In the process, I learnt about the bad corporate ways too. And recounted it all here

Update (27/10/2009):
I got a call from the Vodafone Network people asking me to send across a mail of “appreciation” for the “good work” that they have done!!

I countered that by asking them to send across the details of their CEO so that I could cc to them as well! Strange kind of assholes indeed!

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I had a problem of poor network coverage inside the premises where I work; the solution had to be an in building one. After calling up the customer care, the usual response was that the “concern” was noted down and that the “survey” is being carried out. Emailing them drew no response. Yet, I persisted and escalated the mail to Nodal Officer which did elicit a reply without any firm commitment.

It was then, I realised, that there were various provisions of TRAI that had been violated. I emailed to TRAI as well as to Vodafone; it shook them from their slumber and for the first time, I got an acknowledgement that it would be looked into. Still not getting respite, I managed to get the number of a person who was dealing with TRAI regarding customer complaints. I laid down the entire case, talked to the network head on a conference call with nodal officer in tow. It was a free for all; for the first time, they admitted that there was a network glitch and that needed to be rectified.

Finally, after some more persistence, emailing and cajoling them; I was after the life of the network head; that moron had it from me on different occasions. He finally conceded and went ahead with the installation of the in building solution for persistent problem that most of the employees faced.

I learnt that the easiest solution out for the companies is to “battle” it out in the court because they have a fancy retinue of lawyers on payroll. Given the delay in the legal system, it’s the easiest thing to get a date for the next hearing and postpone the matters. In any case, even if the judgement is delivered in your favour (remote chances given the fact that you have no clue about the technical nature of the complaint), it becomes a herculean task to have it implemented at the earliest to your relief.

I chose not to go to court but push them to their own work. It took a lot of patience and gritting of my teeth but managed to do it.

Alls well that ends well.

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Since the last email (and the last blog post),over a month has elapsed. I heard nothing from them. I had emailed to TRAI and came to know that indeed some action was taken on the complaint which addressed the issue of the violation of their own orders. I managed to get hold of a person in the network “team”- different from the usual nodal/ appellate authority crap. I pressed on the charges and suddenly some sense dawned on them.

It was a stinker of an email sent to their office which specifically mentioned the insults as well as the violation of various TRAI’s regulations. Surprise surprise. In the evening, I got a call from the network in charge as well their commercial office via a conference call. The nodal officer was a party to the same.

It was a free flow of the exchange of the ideas. I told them specifically that any of the concern needs to be given to me in writing. This in turn, would be proof of their inadequacy to service the customer. It appears that they had been well informed about the case; more so when they dropped names. It was worthwhile to name the nodal officer and their ilk about their utter incompetency and to make them work as well as see reason to ensure seamless coverage.

The big news was the mobile number portability which would kick in from this year end. In that case, we can always hold this as a bargaining chip to negotiate better contracts or better service levels.

In all this brouhaha, I learnt that the telecom operators are supposed to file in reports every quarter with TRAI regarding the status of complaints. Although TRAI doesn’t entertain the individual complaints directly, they do write in to the operators when their own regulations are flouted. Most of the operators who don’t respond or address the consumers in the given time frame, do so. Fact of the matter is that there is no point in cursing the idiots because the inherent system is not going to change overnight. The wheels of the Indian Government move slowly at a glacial pace. Hence a bit of patience is required at the same time.

I am toying with the idea of filing a RTI application regarding making those compliance reports as regards to the benchmarks public. Those compliance reports need to be put online; the same should be available on the website of each individual operator so that the status of a given complaint can be tracked. Further, the customer should be informed periodically through SMS regarding the pendency as well as the action taken through written or electronic means.

I threatened Vodafone’s bosses regarding filing of those reports through RTI as well as making these telecom operators little more answerable to their paying customers. I am sure that a strong message has gone and I waiting for the next week when something is promised to happen.

It’s high time something is done on an urgent basis to clean the augean stables.

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I have realised one thing. The whole system sucks because we have allowed it to be so. We have not taken them to task nor demanded any system of accountability. The myth that customer is the king, is good in theory and the private investors have covered their asses really well. At a deeper level, it isnt the fight between a ‘lonely blogger’ and a corporation. I dont fancy such loose ideas for myself. Frankly, the whole purpose is to understand how the system works and how best I can derive the value for my hard earned money.

Below here, I reproduce the email sent to the customer care and the nodal officer. I have cc’d to their appellate authority; probably staffed by some brain dead asshole. So far, I haven’t recieved any of the email from the higher ups and it is next to impossible to break their opaque walls to approach their “CEO” of the likes of such idiot.

Dear Sir/Madam,

This is in pursuance of the earlier emails and the telephonic conversation which I had with one Ms. Geetika Ahuja. I am sorry to say but your company is giving out different versions with each OFFICIAL interaction. You REFUSE TO DOCUMENT the verbal exchange on the telephone.

I quote three different instances:

1) On July 22nd 2009, I had mentioned about one Mr. Rahul who claimed to be a “senior executive” from your company. Despite my insistence, he refused to give me his full name. Further, Mr. Rahul verbally claimed you needed permission to set up an EXTERNAL CELL SITE and that you were awaiting a permission from the Government for the same. The same would be rectified in October. When I challanged him to give me the proof, he hung up.

2) The second email recieved, you had clearly documented in writing about this on 28th July:
However, despite our best efforts towards optimization of the network, due to technical and other problems beyond our control, there could be certain points where indoor coverage may not be that good. This could be due to the presence of big structured buildings, as in your case.
Nonetheless, our network engineers have thoroughly investigated your complaint and have tried to find the possible solution under the circumstances. Maximizing and optimizing the network for an error free service is an ongoing activity of Vodafone.

3) The third email recieved on 4th August 2009 from the nodal office:
“At the outset, we would like to state that our current outdoor network coverage is adequate and comparable with any other network.Nonetheless, our network engineers have thoroughly investigated your complaint and have tried to find the possible solution under the circumstances. Maximizing and optimizing the network for an error free service is an ongoing activity of Vodafone.Further, we would also like to inform you that to enhance the network connectivity we require the approval from concerned authorities regarding installation of In-building solution.

The point here is that on 22nd July, you needed permission to install cell site. On 28th July, you blamed the building for the poor network coverage. On 4th August 2009 you agreed that there was a problem with the coverage and to “enhance” the poor coverage you needed an inbuilding solution for the same.

YOUR COMPANY HAS BEEN UNABLE TO STICK ON TO ONE STAND.

Then on 07/08/2009 I get a call from Ms. Geetika Ahuja who informs me VERBALLY that they have sought the permission from the hospital authorities and wanted me to meet Vodafone’s network engineer in person to liase with the concerned people to have the required inbuilding solution installed. I refused that point blank because I am nowhere concerned with the nitty gritty of this matter and I need a working solution at the earliest.

There are several points here:

1) Your changing statements with every email can be put up in court of law because each time you are misguiding a customer. If I have to claim compensation PURELY on these grounds, I can easily claim that. I am sure that your “legal eagles” and the smart battery of lawyers WOULD understand this. For the same reason, you as a NODAL OFFICER, can be hauled up in the courts for CHANGING you official line of communication to a customer. I have full right to press charges against you for deficiency in service, for causing me mental harrassment and for misleading me in your official communication with me.

2) If you agree that an inbuilding solution needs to be installed to “enhance the coverage”, I have VERY CLEARLY mentioned in the earlier emails to your customer care department. WHY WAS NO ACTION TAKEN EARLIER?

3) I need to have a time frame, the details of the permission sought for from the hospital authorities in writing and the refusal if any, to be documented and shown to me in writing. I cannot TRUST a company which changes it’s version in every email.

4) It is only because of my persistence that I am seeing a change in your statements. Had I NOT PERSISTED, you would have JUST IGNORED MY EMAILS.

SHAME SHAME VODAFONE. Your credibility has gone down to the pits. I cannot expect a multibillion dollar multinational to have it’s corporate ethics gone down the drain. I am surprised that this is not in the notice of the higher ups because I am sure that they would be pained to see such crass behaviour from the nodal office and NO RESPONSE from the appellate authority who HAS SO FAR NOT EVEN RESPONDED to EVEN ONE EMAIL.

The matter would have simply ended with your admission of the fact that there is a problem with the network reception and if you would have paid heed to my earlier emails. Constraining myself to a civilised public discourse, I am extremely sorry to say that I am anguished and frustrated at your behaviour and you have caused me undue mental harrassment. The least I can expect you to do is to expedite the matters at your end and give me my network coverage.

Needless to say, my lawyer has examined the contents of the email and if need be, I would be pressing for the charges and claim heavy punitive damages from you and your company for causing me UNDUE MENTAL HARRASSMENT, WASTE OF MY VALUABLE PROFESSIONAL TIME and GROSS DEFICIENCY IN SERVICE.

I hope and expecting that there are qualified people in your department WHO CAN UNDERSTAND THE CONTENTS OF THE EMAIL and ACT ACCORDINGLY.

I am awaiting response to the latest tirade against the morons

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As usual, frequent call drops and inaccessibility has made my life miserable inside the campus. At first, they were “happy” to claim that an in building solution would be provided to address the issue. This was put down on some pretext or the other. I had no option except to grit my teeth and accept the status quo. It was then that Airtel installed it’s “boosters” and I sent a formal request to Vodafone to tie up with Airtel to share their infrastructure.

I understand that this is done on a revenue sharing basis; the company doesn’t want to incur on this cost for very obvious reasons.

It is from this time that the tug of war started. The first problem was the emphatic denial of the company that their network had no issues; which they claimed in writing. Unfortunately, a few hired dingbats from their company called in to narrate different versions of sob stories. One claimed that they needed permission from the Government to set up a cell site. Other bugger insisted that he’d be contend to “sweet talk” my pants off; for which I wasn’t forthcoming for very obvious reasons.

Finally, on a hot Sunday afternoon, I got a call from the Vodafone’s Nodal Office. It was supposed to be an official call but the idiot had it from me; specially when I quoted specific provisions of TRAI act which made it mandatory to ensure that there was no disruption of services.

Anyway, I mailed in to the Secretary of TRAI who, as per the information on the website, is supposed to ensure that the various regulations as passed by TRAI are enforced. On expected lines, the bloody leechy babu didnot even acknowledge my email. I mailed them on other occasions and specifically told that I’d be seeking the information through other means; to no avail.

I have now sought information under Right to Information Act, 2005 which is an amazing piece of legislation and perhaps truly empowers the citizens of India.

How are these two incidents related to each other? I want to exert pressure on Vodafone Essar to act; to get TRAI in the loop because these bunch of morons are good for nothing and to force them to act on my behalf.

It does take time for information to filter out but emboldened by this, I plan to seek information about the Broadband pricing; the various heads under which it is charged and why the official definition has not been revised in as many years.

Watch this space.

It’s high time we act in unison. I remember the time when we had forced BSNL (and it’s lethargic army of frigging idiots) to implement unlimited Broadband. At that point of time, I was totally convinced that a concerted public action can achieve wonders. At this point of time, it’s me who is alone in fight against the big bad corporate telecom company and I intend to take the battle in their court till the time I am assured of a decent network coverage; something that I pay for.

Oh by the way, it reminds me that so far, Vodafone Essar would qualify easily for the “COVETED” asshole of the year award!!

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The telecom companies exist solely for making their services available and ensuring that as a customer, my services, as promised or intended work. It also means that I need an effective complaint resolution and access to the people who are concerned with running the nitty gritty of the services.

This is the idealised world.

The reality.

I have been facing a lot of hassle with the Vodafone network in my hospital premises. At first, they blamed it on the lack of an effective in building solution. Once that was installed, they are again dragging their feet and sweet talking the shit out and testing my patience time and again.

Contrast, their Zoozoo advertisements or their tagline,”happy to help”. Bullshit. I have never ever seen a company that moves slower than a glacial iceberg. If it were the likes of MTNL, I could have understood. But the entry of private operators has done nothing to address my concerns.

Further, I know not, anyone in the company. It is as if they are hiding behind a giant firewall; if you are pissed from the dumb struck morons to address your “concerns”, you have no option except to grin and bear it. For your information, the collective intelligence of the people hired as “executives” is not more than a bird brain but then if your throw peanuts, you’d get only monkeys.

The companies spend huge amounts to address the so called “after sales” but then everyone is aware of the need for roping in customers. If they grow at such a pace, the one which they claim, it would be impossible to “satisfy” each one of them unless your communication skills are par excellence and homogenous rationalised tariff plans.

I chose not to keep quiet about what I feel and set up a blog that addresses precisely these issues.

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